Aligning To Your Lifestyle Vision – Understanding The Risks

I often remind my clients to align to their values.  These are not empty words, cliches or merely a throwaway line. It is a common phrase and a foundational principle of life transformation coaching. In simple terms this is defined as lining up what you believe and value, and then behaving and living in a way that reflects those values. This process can be challenging and confronting as your world, as you know and believe it, starts changing as you start living with the awareness and intention to change and transform your life.

For a lot of people this can be incredibly challenging - the changes after all can be monumental. Changing things up brings risk into the equation. That risk is about letting go of things, people, beliefs and behaviours that have defined you and your life. These changes often challenge your security, your status and your ego. Many people do not entertain doing these things as it is far too daunting - and quite ironically life changing.

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Many choose not to take up the challenge - the well worn path of what is believed and known, is far safer than the unknown and the unchartered regions of possibility and potential. I call it the uncomfortable comfort zone. That is, the decision (and it is always a decision..) to stay and exist in a situation or a state of mind where it appears easier to keep things the way they are to avoid the pain of change and moving into the unknown.

It can take incredible energy, willpower, discipline, motivation and inspiration to make the decision to consciously change your life - and to follow it through. It is near on impossible to make these changes if you are not clear on the way/s to do this. Often the best intentions are just nowhere near enough. Need proof on that? Failed New Year Resolutions are a good example of the best intentions just fading away. Add fad diets, failed fitness plans, and relationship and career intentions to that as well.

The biggest risk of failure (to reach a goal for example) is to blindly set out and declare you want change where there is no foundation, no aligned personal values, and no real commitment to the process towards achieving the outcome.

Lets look at some of the things you can do to align to your lifestyle vision:

  • Firstly you need to create one!
  • It needs to reflect what is really important to you - NOT what is important to others, or what you think might be important to others, or even what others might say is important for you. This is all about YOU. You live your life - not anyone else.
  • Introspection and time to think...and not think. Call this mindfulness, awareness, meditation, quiet contemplation or whatever. Start the journey to understanding you more and what really makes you happy, joyful and contented in life.
  • Once you are clear/er on what is important to you and what you value, start behaving your way towards that vision. Behaviour in alignment to values calibrates effective and lasting change. You are not sending mixed messages to yourself and the world around you because you are living authentically.
  • Trust is incredibly important. Trust yourself. Trust that you are moving forward in life in ways that are congruent to your values and what is important to you.
  • Be patient. Lasting transformational change can take time.
  • Look for signs of improvement and success in your life towards your vision. A simple way to do this is to start using a gratitude journal to document what you are grateful for and what you are doing, and who you are being in pursuit of your vision.
  • Whilst I would not advocate not listening to others, I would encourage you to listen to what they really might be saying. Advice is easy. Its readily available. It is also from someone elses perspective and experience. That does not necessarily mean it is not useful or indeed valid of course. A good rule of thumb is to listen with a strong sense of who you are and are becoming - others' fears and attachment to what they deem to be security and reality is really about them. Remember that well meaning people are not necessarily well understanding people.

There is much, much more to this. I will be exploring this in further blogs and programs. The key is to connect to who it is you are and to live your life on your terms - if that is what you choose to do of course. There are challenges and compromises along the journey to you, but with each day and each aligned action and intention, you move closer towards the life and the lifestyle that you truly want to live.

If you would like to learn more about how you can align to your values and move closer to living the life you want to live, a certified and credentialed life transformation coach can guide and support you through that process. If you would like further information, or would like to make an appointment for a coaching session please contact me.

 

 

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